Sunday, April 24, 2011

Donald Trump for President?

I enjoy politics, that's no lie. Anybody who went to college with me was aware of this because I was always sitting in the front row for our Politics class (Nerd) and listened to every word the professor gave out as well as throwing in my own two cents every now and then. And they also knew that I followed the 2008 election like it was waving a carrot in front of my nose. So I'd like to take this moment to comment on a person who is throwing his name into the mix for 2012: Donald Trump.

In 2012 Trump plans to become the first orange man elected president

I'll come out and say it: This is a joke candidacy. The Donald doesn't want to be POTUS, he wants to keep his name in the limelight since The Apprentice can't draw views like it used to and also because said reality show is in the dreaded "Celebrity" seasons (AKA: Shit nobody cares about).
And come on, America, you really want a guy like Trump as President? Politics is a harsh world to live in, with both sides throwing bombs at each other. You really think that a man like Donald Trump will be able to survive in a world like that when he started a war of words with Rosie O'Donnell? I mean, yeah, Rosie annoys a lot of people, but Trump acted like she had castrated him and then took a dump on his face. All she did was mock him, dude needs to lighten up. Besides, considering his hairdo has been a punchline for over a decade, you thin he'd have thicker skin than that.

I mean, can you imagine how it would be if a foreign leader disagreed with him?

SchweitzerMan: President Trump, what are you comments regarding Nicolas Sarkozy criticizing your new economic policy?

President Trump: Well look, Schweitzer-Man, Sarkozy is a moron and it's not surprising that he's the President of France because France is full of idiots. I mean, look at the Eiffel tower. It's the ugliest phallic shaped tower I've ever seen. I've been to Paris, had an awful time. Look, French people are retards, plain and simple. And if they can find their ass with their own two hands, maybe they can give me a smart reason why I shouldn't keep doing what I'm doing. Oh and be sure to watch this week's episode of "The Apprentice: White House" on NBC.

OK, maybe he wouldn't call all French people retards but at the same time I wouldn't put it past him.

Back over ten years ago, Mad TV did a sketch where Donald Trump appeared on a fictional BET show called Reality Check and was asked why he thought he could be President. The two fat hosts got laughs at his expense before Trump got upset and called them water buffaloes (Which makes me wonder if Trump wrote the dialogue for this sketch). Naturally they proceed to tear him a new one verbally but let's face it, that's pretty much how it goes with Trump. You either kiss his ass and tell him how much you love the apprentice or you're on his enemies list.

I remember liking this show...before it got over exposed

He's planning on announcing his candidacy on an episode of Celebrity Apprentice and already you can tell that he's not going to. He'll give some bullshit reason about how he'd rather spend time doing what he's doing right now but he'll thank all the idiots who tune in to see him tell them something they should already know in the first place.

Technically it's a brilliant move: Make a big announcement on a show that not a lot of people are watching to make the ratings skyrocket and then you can claim that The Apprentice is the biggest show on television.

Oh and stop with the Obama birth certificate thing. For Christ sake, you think if WikiLeaks could uncover anything it would be that.

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