Thursday, April 28, 2011

Schweitzer-Man and the Freaky Deaky Tiki

When I took over the task of watching Lyle for Aaron and Katelynn, I was under the assumption that they would return the morning on Monday, the 25th. So you can imagine my surprise as I heard the door opening on the morning of the 24th as Lyle started pacing around like mad as the lock on the front door started to click.

Naturally since it was Easter Sunday I assumed it was an attack by the Easter Bunny and was just about to load my AK-47 to greet the bastard when it turns out that it was Aaron and Katelynn returning home. I could get into a whole rant about how Aaron had previously told me it was the 25th but I won't. And you'll probably ask, "Why would you want to use an AK-47 on the Easter Bunny? He's such a lovely, cuddly creature."
My answer: You clearly didn't see the Easter Bunny in Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey. That thing is scary.

This is the face of a bunny that will do horrible things to you...

Since I was such a good boy in taking care of Lyle and not burning down their house, Katelynn gave me a little souvenir she picked up in Hawaii. It was a miniature tiki. Mine was the god of money. She had also brought home the rock from a volcano which she meant to give to Aaron's mother. She also noted that it was apparently cursed or something.
"Perfect gift for your future mother-in-law," I said.

So I'm back in my usual home with a little tiki giving me face of either intended horror or constipation. However just before going to sleep this morning, I decided I would check the mailbox. Sure enough, there was an envelope with my name on it. I opened it up and was delighted to see my tax return had arrived from the government. I'm not going to reveal the amount, but needless to say, I think the tiki is working.

Behold my new God!

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