Saturday, April 23, 2011

The House-Sitters Club

People usually mistake me for a superhero given the way my name sounds. And the truth is that I usually like to help people when they really need it and if it allows me to show of the awesomeness that is me.

With that in mind, you shouldn't be surprised how quickly I lept into action last Tuesday when I got a call around nine o'clock in the evening from Aaron's fiancee, Katelynn. The following is a transcript of that call.

Schweitzer-Man: (Yawn) Yes?

Katelynn: Oh, Schweitzer-Man! You have to get to our place right away, you're the only one who can help us!!!

Schweitzer-Man: Damn right I'm the only one who can help. Now, what's the situation?

Katelynn: It's our dog, Lyle! He needs your help, this is an emergancy!!!

Lyle is a weiner dog who has a bizarre fetish for ovens (Not kidding) but is pretty cool for a dog. So if he's in danger, you bet your ass I'm going to help. Two seconds later I was outside Aaron and Katelynn's house. I decided to enter the house since knocking would only delay any rescuing that might need to happen.

Schweitzer-Man: I'm here!

Katelynn: OK, now that you're here, Lyle needs to be watched until Aaron and I get back from Hawaii early Monday morning. Bye!!!

In truth, what really happened was actually funnier than I made it sound but needless to say, I'm taking care of Lyle and he's really gotten use to me. As I'm typing this he seems to have fallen asleep on my lap.

It's cool having my own place, being able to cook my own meals, not having to hear crying babies although Lyle whimpers endlessly every time I go to the bathroom. One thing I wish the little guy would do is try to get a stronger bladder. Seriously, dog, just try to go twelve hours without pooping.

Admit it. You said, "Awwwwww" when you saw this picture

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