Monday, November 30, 2009

Movin' on Down

 OK, while my new place may not be up to the standard of George and Wheezie. Again, I seem to be lodging in a computer room which might lead to some problems but I don't see that happening. A king size bed is nice as well as my own bathroom though it's not on the same floor. Still, I long for the day where I have my own kitchen where I can create some of Gordon Ramsay's masterpieces as well as not having to worry about being too loud for other people living in the house. That and if I had my own place I could enforce my "Clothing Optional" policy when alone. Which leads to my roommates. I live with a nice young couple and their two kids. Twins, a boy and girl, 14 months old. For little kids they sure weren't the most talkative. I remember how my neighbour's grandkids would jabber on for hours and hours when they were that age. These ones just stared at me, wondering who I was and why I was there to begin with. Later on before going to bed, the little boy watched me in amazement as I bounced a ball back and forth between my hands. I'm told that they have a tendency to bite things so I'll have to be careful. The longer walk to the train station in the mornings is probably going to be best described as a bitch but there's not much else I can do about that except request that I start a little bit later than 6:30AM but at the moment, considering the staffing problems we have already at work and how things seem to go to shit whenever my shift is always done, early mornings work just fine.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

The Flying Assholes

About a week before Flying J took me on as their newest employee (a title that keeps changing as more and more employees are fired/resigning and more people are hired) they switched over to a 24/7 prepay system. Simply put, you have to pay before we turn on the pumps. No exceptions, no nothing. However this has gotten some customers to declare, “I’m never coming to this place again!” or “I’m not going to be surprised in three months when this place goes down!” Since I am in front of a till and have the ability to control all the pumps, this has brought most of the criticism in my direction as well as that of my co-workers. While Flying J policy insists that we turn the other cheek (I would prefer to show them the cheeks of my ass), I have decided that I am not going to take verbal abuse any longer, especially if the customer reacts to the policy like they've just been told that in order for me to turn on the pumps they must first service me orally. I almost implemented this policy last weekend when a customer (late 50’s at least) came in while my supervisor (Let’s call her C) was out for a smoke. The customer (Let’s call him A-Hole) came in and when informing him of the policy and explaining that there was nothing I could do about it, instructed me to get C. For some reason, customers like A-Hole seem to assume that when we say, “There’s nothing I can do about it” or “It’s out of our control” that we are lying, naturally. And in all fairness they’re half right. I could turn on the pumps, let them pump their gas and then have them come in and pay it. But then I’d be out of a job because management is really strict about stuff like that. So alas, no rebellion on our part for customer satisfaction can be tolerated and unless a customer is able to get me a new job straight away with better pay, less hours and less work altogether, then their pleas are no good to me. C was brought in (She later told me, “As soon as I saw him, I knew there was going to be trouble.”) and A-Hole explained himself. A-Hole: You know me, I’ve been coming here ever since this place opened! C: I know but that’s the policy. A-Hole: Well that’s bullshit! (Looks at me) Just turn on the pump, I’ll leave my debit card here, and you can charge me when I’m done. SchweitzerMan: I can’t. A-Hole: Well, what the fuck!? (To C) I want you to turn those pumps on! You’re lying about not being able to turn them on! SchweitzerMan: No I’m not! (I would have gotten into it verbally with this prick but C held up a hand to keep me cool and I’m glad she did) Eventually C was able to convince A-Hole that there was no going around it and that he had to pay first. He slammed his debit card down on the counter in front of me. SchweitzerMan: How much do you want to put in? A-Hole: I want to fill it up! SchweitzerMan: Well, I need a dollar amount since you’re paying with a debit card. A-Hole: WHAT!? I should probably mention that for prepay, if you’re doing it with credit card, you get charged for whatever you pump, but with a debit card, you have to set a dollar amount and should you pump less than that, you come back in the store and we give you the difference. However, A-Hole was acting like his namesake. SchweitzerMan: Ain’t I a stinker? (OK, that last line didn’t really happen, but I was thinking it). A-Hole: I don’t know how much I’m going to put in! What the hell am I supposed to do about that!? SchweitzerMan: Sir, it’s better to give a high amount, that way if you don’t put the full amount in, we give you the difference back in cash. A-Hole: Oh no! This is a company card, that’s going to fuck up my accounting! How am I going to explain that to my company? SchweitzerMan: (Starting to get annoyed with him) Sir, I can print you out a receipt showing that this is money we give back to you. C: This is how we do it every time here. A-Hole: Well this will be the last time it ever happens here! Eventually A-Hole decided he would put in $700 into his truck and left. SchweitzerMan: (To C) Well, problem solved. He said this is the last time we’d have to deal with this problem. I knew that he would be back because his truck probably wouldn’t take that much gas. All of the other cashiers were watching with baited breath, hoping to see what would happen and if any slurs would be flung. A-Hole slammed his receipt on the counter in some attempt to intimidate me but he was about as intimidating as Siegfried and Roy so I actually spent the rest of my time biting the inside of my mouth in an attempt not to laugh. A-Hole: Now what if I wanted to put a thousand dollars into my truck and I only pumped one hundred dollars worth? SchweitzerMan: I suppose I would have to give you back nine hundred dollars. A-Hole: Well then I think I know what I’m going to do next time. We’ll see how clever you think you are. SchweitzerMan: OK. I knew he was trying to get some reaction out of me but I kept biting my cheek and decided to just have a blasé attitude about him from here on out. I suppose I could have informed him that his plan would not work, as the limit for debit here is about $700, but I decided to let him get excited enough to spray his shorts about getting one up on Flying J staff and wished him a good day. Sorry, but there’s no need to be an asshole. I don’t determine company policy otherwise I think I would be making a lot more money than I do at the moment and like I said, I would get paid for sleeping on the job. I've also decided to make it a policy to instruct customers not to refer to me as Jesus Christ. Every so often I'll have a customer like A-Hole and upon explaining the policy they seem to deem me their lord and saviour and cry, "Jesus Christ!" While it is flattering, I am afraid that it might offend any non-Christians in the workplace. That and I can't walk on water.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Star Trek

I’ve been a fan of Star Trek since I was about four years old. Granted, I had no idea what the hell was going on, can barely remember which episodes I watched and for some reason was afraid that Worf was going to come through the screen and kill me (again, I was four years old and had no idea that underneath all that makeup was just Michael Dorn).

I grew up on Star Trek: The Next Generation while my father’s generation and those before him grew up loving The Original Series. And after TNG ended, I followed all the other shows in the franchise very closely...except for Star Trek: Enterprise. I knew Enterprise would suck from the moment it was announced. Prequels suck with the exception to the Star Wars prequels though 10 years after being released I see that they are not quite the masterpieces I saw them to be when I was 12.

Monday, November 9, 2009

Silent Hill? More like Shitty Heap

A couple of Saturdays ago during dinner, my friend Aaron, his girlfriend Katelyn and I decided to sit down and watch one of the many illegally downloaded movies on his big screen TV. Not exactly sure how but we ended up watching Silent Hill.

Never have I been so bored watching what is supposed to be a "horror" movie. The characters were bland, stupid and most of their actions made no sense. I'm still confused as to how it all came back to the little girl, I don't know why I should care. I don't know why the mother initially ran from that cop.

Biggest thing was the ending. What the hell am I supposed to take from this? Are they dead? Is it a ghost world they live in? Why are they in that world? Is it an alternate reality? How did they get in, can they get out? And I don't care if I'm spoiling this for anyone. Fuck spoilers, I'm saving you money and time by warning you away from this heinous piece of shit.

Speaking of alternate realities, I have quite a bit to say about the new Star Trek movie

Back in to speak

Finally got myself a new laptop after weeks of delays and procrastination. Expect more updates, hopefully, as the weeks go on. Really liking the webcam that comes installed on this, might even start making video entries. Only downside is that means I would have to bathe more often to keep up a presentable appearance.

Been a bit behind on all the news websites I normally look at and am doing my best to catch up.

Behind the Scenes

It almost sounds a bit strange for me to actually say it out loud but for the past year, I've been making comics. Certainly not on a pro...